this that was missing

i know that

i’ve been holding a hole in my chest,

open just wide enough for your eyes to peek


i’m weakened,


i have no immunity to truth.

what i knew only to be in me,

i also saw in you;

though our youth


betrayed us both,

the grief and shame

never gave way to hope.

like a leaf in a window pane,


we’ve lived,

now we watch from safety,

as those kids

grow into their own homemaking.


we’ll give

the world a childhood worth living.


it just seems

the better we get at coexisting,

it must be –

it always was this that was missing.

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